Any parent will agree that arguing with a 7-year old is a very challenging thing to do. Perhaps it is a part of the many mysteries in life, but there are those times that no matter how hard you argue with your child, he is always able to give you a smart comeback. On top of that, your child often gets very successful at pushing your buttons and leaving you speechless.

It has remained a real wonder how children manage to come up with this witty comebacks. But one thing is certain – children have several “traps” for you to fall into. That is why it is important to know these traps in order for you to avoid them. When you realize what these traps are, you will be able to hold your child accountable for his actions.

Although it is normal for kids to blame external factors for their mistakes, it does not mean that is right. Kids do this because they believe that they are the victims of the situation even when it is actually their fault. Thinking of themselves as victims makes children feel that they are immune for responsibility and blame.

If you often notice your child blame other people whenever you call his attention and corrects his behavior, then there is a need to challenge the way your child sees himself. If he acts out and starts to make a scene whenever you make him realize his unacceptable behavior, then you need to find ways to stop that pattern immediately.

Children should be discouraged from blaming other people, situations, or things for not completing a certain task and for not meeting set expectations. When your child blames someone else, in reality he is saying that it is not his fault because he is the victim.

One good example is the classic, “My dog ate my homework”. In reality, your child is trying to tell you, “I am the victim of my dog, so I am not accountable for not having my homework.”

Children who see themselves as victims and are tolerated to believe that kind of thinking will grow up having a hard time achieving some of the very important milestones that early life development demands. So when your son tells you next time that his classmate punched him first, tell him “Blaming your classmate does not solve anything. You need to apologize to him right now or I will tell your father about this.”

The earlier you break your child’s habit of blaming others and dodging responsibility, the better. You have to know what these thinking errors are so that you can hold your kids accountable for their behavior. You have to understand how these thinking errors work so you can avoid falling into your children’s traps and put a stop to their blaming, excuse-making, and victim-thinking habits.

Looking for parenting advice? We highly recommend The Total Transformation Program for parents dealing with Obnoxious Children. Check on the link for more information.